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This is a conversation between a Ghanaian man and popular Facebook user David Papa Bondzie-Mbir, who describes himself as a good listener but not a relationship expert.
David has over the years shared stories of many people who decide to go anonymous with their problems in marriage, relationship, and love life.
Some of these stories became very topical issues discussed on most media platforms.
Read the latest conversation which he tags as #Mychatwithhim below
Life will always present us with different choices and reasons to either have to make them or not. And a lot of the time, we may deem it right to take certain actions – because they look right in our thoughts. Difficult as some choices may be, we make them anyways. He made a choice, and he’s not ready to face its consequences. -DBM
#MyChatWithHim
RA: Hi David. How do you do?
David Bondze (DB): Hello! How do you do!
RA: Hmmm! I have a problem
DB: I realized
RA: Are you going to publish this chat?
DB: That’s if you consent to it
RA: Cool! Keep me anonymous
DB: Sure
RA: I’ve impregnated two women.
DB: Really? Congratulations!
RA: Oh, charley
DB: Smh!
RA: Hmmm!
DB: Who are these women?
RA: My wife and … You know the thing
DB: No, I don’t know the ‘thing’. What is the ‘thing’?
RA: A girlfriend
DB: How long have you been married?
RA: Eight (8) years this year.
DB: I see. You have any other kids?
RA: No. These are my first kids.
DB: Which of the two women got pregnant first?
RA: My girlfriend.
DB: How long have you been seeing her?
RA: Just a couple of months.
DB: Can you tell me the exact couple of months?
RA: Six (6) months. I didn’t know a woman could be that fertile.
DB: Okay! Tell me a little about your wife
RA: We share a common belief. Since I got to know her, I’ve been highly elevated to myself.
DB: What does that mean?
RA: I see the best in me anytime I am thinking of her
DB: That’s nice
RA: I trust her with every breath I take, and she inspires honesty in me
DB: Hmmm!
RA: She’s a goal getter. Another good thing about her that inspires me a lot. Her strength in character is so up there, she’s always confident in herself.
DB: Okay!
RA: My wife is not selfish. She cares about the needs of others. She’s very beautiful to me. When I married her, I meant every vow I said. It’s just recently that I broke my word.
DB: Why did you break your word?
RA: I was scared of being childless.
DB: How so?
RA: Dave, seven years in a childless marriage? It was daunting
DB: When you first met your wife, were kids written all over her face?
RA: No
DB: Did you fall in love with the idea of her giving you children?
RA: Not really
DB: Why did you choose her amongst the lot?
RA: Because she brought out something good in me. And I loved her very much
DB: Why couldn’t you hold on to those very same reasons?
RA: I don’t know. When we were getting married, the prayers the preachers prayed fervently was “Be fruitful and multiply”. And it wasn’t happening for us.
DB: I see
RA: That’s why I went for the other girl.
DB: Do you love the other woman?
RA: I’m not sure. She wanted a kid. I needed a kid too, so we came to a compromise
DB: That?
RA: That we would attempt getting pregnant and see if it could happen
DB: I see
RA: Now, my wife is pregnant too, and I am confused
DB: Confused about what?
RA: Everything that is happening to me. I didn’t expect it
DB: But I thought you wanted a child?
RA: I do. I just didn’t want this complication. Two women pregnant for me? How am I going to divide my attention? I am a Christian, and I am not in favor of abortion, but I am tempted to tell the other woman to get rid of it.
DB: How old is her pregnancy?
RA: Two months or so
DB: And that of your wife’s?
RA: A couple of weeks too. My wife cannot know. I can’t afford to break my family
DB: How old are you?
RA: 39
DB: And your wife?
RA: 36
DB: The other woman?
RA: 34 or so.
DB: Is she single or married?
RA: We decided not to talk about those things
DB: I don’t get it
RA: She doesn’t know I am married. I do not know about her marital status either.
DB: Really?
RA: Yeah! It’s a thing that is going on.
DB: I see
RA: What do I do?
DB: You tell your wife the truth
RA: Hahahaha! Are you kidding me? Lol
DB: You told me earlier – she inspires trustworthiness in you. This is your time to prove it
RA: I can’t. Forget it. That’s a no no. My wife has this attitude of switching off when pissed. She would not mind me till she’s in a better mood.
DB: A wife should not be in a good mood before she’s nice to her husband
RA: I wish you could tell her that. Hmmm!
DB: What are you going to do?
RA: I need your help, Dave. Should I tell the other woman to abort the pregnancy?
DB: What makes you think a 34 years old woman would want to just abort her first pregnancy?
RA: She has to. I don’t need that child.
DB: You both needed that child; that was the reason you had to sleep together
RA: But I do not need it anymore. My wife is pregnant now. I want to have kids with only my wife
DB: I see.
RA: It’s in my right to get that pregnancy aborted, right? I’m its father
DB: Are you the one carrying the pregnancy? Did the pregnancy happen all by your effort?
RA: A friend of mine gave me a drug to put in her drink. If she doesn’t agree to the abortion, I might have to implement this
DB: You are willing to put another woman’s life and pregnancy in danger because of your negligence?
RA: Hmmm! I’m desperate here, Dave. The drug helps with quick abortion
DB: Let me post it on my page for opinions.
RA: Ok. I am sorry for bothering you this afternoon.
DB: I’m cool. You know, sometimes, it’s the seemingly small decisions that can change our lives forever.
RA: I did not know my wife could get pregnant. She hadn’t been for seven years. How would I have known?
DB: Your life changes the very moment you choose to make a congruent, and committed decision. Having unprotected sex with a woman who is not your wife, is one of such decisions.
RA: I made a mistake, Dave. Who hasn’t made a mistake before?
DB: We all are responsible for our deeds, and we are expected to accept the consequences of these choices we make. The consequences of every action we take, every spoken word and thoughts throughout our lifetime.
RA: Hmmm!
