Dear GhanaWeb: My mother has been having sex with me since I was 14

Dear GhanaWeb, I am a 20-year-old university student, and there is something about my life that I have never told anyone. I grew up with my mother. I have never known my father. According to her, he died a year after I was born, and she has never been able to love another man since then. She often tells me that I remind her of him. But what started happening between my mother and me when I was 14 has completely changed my life. My mother began forcing me to have sex with her. She did not want me to attend boarding school because, according to her, she wanted me close to her. At first, I knew it was wrong and I did not understand why my own mother was doing this to me. As the years passed, however, I became emotionally and sexually attached to what was happening. It became almost normal to me. We were having sex almost every night, and it started affecting my studies because I barely got enough sleep. I eventually complained to my mother about how tired I was and how it was affecting my academics. Instead of stopping what was happening between us, she got me a private tutor. Now, more than seven years later, I am on campus, but I still find myself going home almost every day because of my mother. The biggest problem is that I cannot seem to build a normal romantic relationship. I have tried dating women, but whenever I meet someone, I eventually lose interest and go back to my mother. It feels as though my attachment to her is stronger than anything I can build with another person. I have read about people who have relationships with their parents on GhanaWeb, and it makes me feel ashamed and confused. I know that what is happening is not normal, but at the same time, I cannot seem to stop wanting it. I have never told anyone about this. Not a friend, lecturer, family member or counsellor. Part of me believes that if I could finally talk to someone I trust, I might be able to understand what has happened to me and begin to break away from it. I want to experience the kind of healthy relationship I see my friends having. I want to be able to give someone affection without constantly feeling pulled back toward my mother. How would you begin breaking free from a relationship that has become so deeply rooted in your life? I need help, please. FG/EB Osebo the Zaraman opens up on life, fashion and controversies Source: www.ghanaweb.com
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