Dear GhanaWeb: I’ve been scammed by the man I thought loved me

Dear GhanaWeb, A year ago, I met a man online. He was 45, the same age as I was. He told me he was divorced. I am also divorced and a mother of four children. From the beginning, he seemed like a genuinely good man. He was supportive, caring, and always available whenever I needed someone to talk to. He told me he had a home in Accra but had moved to Tamale after his divorce to cool off and concentrate on farming. He would send me pictures of himself on his farm and pictures of onions, ginger, pepper, tomatoes and other farm products he said he was supplying to people in different countries. At one point, he even sent me a bag of farm produce. He also helped me financially. He sent me GH₵1,000 for my son's birthday and bought me a new phone when I complained that my old one needed replacing. Because of all these things, I gradually became comfortable with him and trusted him. The only strange thing was that, despite dating for almost a year, we had never actually met. We planned to meet several times, but there was always an excuse. Sometimes he said he was busy on the farm. Other times he claimed he was locked up somewhere and couldn't come. Sometimes he would simply tell me that he wanted us to keep getting to know each other better before meeting. He often made me feel that marriage was eventually going to happen. He would say he didn't want to rush into another marriage and make the same mistakes he had made before. Then one day, he asked me whether I had money in my bank account and I told him I did. He said he needed a loan of GH₵200,000 and promised to pay it back within a week or two. I had more than that in my account. The money was my savings and money my former husband had given me after our divorce. I had kept it carefully and was investing some of it in T-Bills because it was meant for my children and me. But I trusted this man wholeheartedly. I was willing to lend him the money. Then he told me he didn't want to incur extra charges. He asked me to give him my banking details so he could log into my bank account through the app on his phone and withdraw the GH₵200,000 while I watched the transaction from my own phone. I don't know what was wrong with me that day. I gave him the details. He withdrew exactly GH₵200,000. I saw the notification and thought everything was fine. But later that night, around midnight, he went back into my account and withdrew the rest of my money. By the time I saw the notifications around 9 am, he had taken more than GH₵360,000 in total. I immediately started calling him, but his phones were no longer going through. That was when I realized I had probably been deceived from the beginning. I reported the matter to the police. They eventually found the man whose pictures I had been receiving. But the most shocking part came during the investigation. The man they found was not the person I had been talking to. Someone had apparently been using his pictures to communicate with me and manipulate me into trusting him. The real man was innocent and was eventually released. Now it has been about a month, and I still haven't received any clear information from the police about what is happening with the investigation or whether the person who stole my money will ever be found. I have been thinking about everything over and over again. The gifts, the phone, the money for my son's birthday, the farm pictures, the promises of marriage, the excuses for never meeting. I keep asking myself how someone can spend a whole year building trust just to destroy another person's life. The money was not just money to me. It was my savings, my children's future and the security I had tried so hard to build after my divorce. I am sad, confused and angry with myself, even though I know I was the victim. How should I go about this? I need help! FG/EB Osebo the Zaraman opens up on life, fashion and controversies Source: www.ghanaweb.com
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