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Abortion: A Woman's Or A Man's Decision?

Sat, 19 Sep 2009 Source: The Royal Enoch

I always seem to get caught up in mixed emotions when reminiscing about the past. You see, my past has seen so many joys and sorrows. Hidden secrets here and there- love lost and won. Women who came and never stayed. Women who expected me to stay, but I wouldn't and couldn't stay. I do remember telling some of them that I needed my space, whatever that meant. I also do remember a time when I was so heart broken that I swore never to love again. Not knowing that in life you win some and you lose some. But there were some other moments to which were kind and gentle. But like so many things in life those moments were not meant to last. And now all that I've got left of the past is the memory of.

I came across a lady, who to me was the closest thing to heaven. This lady took my heart and did ride it to glory. She also taught me both the beauty, and the mystery of love in so many ways. So many wonderful ways, I must add. She was must older than me, but hey. I was willing to learn and she was most wiling to teach. And you know, a good student never misses on the opportunity to learn. Things felt pretty familiar the very first time that we met. It all just clicked perfectly. Our spirits were intertwined. And the moment was like a stolen page from the golden book of love itself. Usually when two people meet there is always this awkward tension. Both of them try to be something that they are not. However, in our case there was absolutely no need to pretend. Things felt natural and right.


She invited me to her house the very same day, and we had unprotected sex. Several weeks later, she did hit me with the news that she is pregnant. In fact, my initial reaction was okay and that was it.


Mind you, I wasn't okay financially, but that didn't trouble me at all. Although I knew very well that both our lives were going to change. Perhaps for the better or perhaps for the worse. However, an abortion was not going to be an option. At least that's how I felt. By the way, I was not going to make a big deal out of it.

Just about two months into her pregnancy, she made up her mind to go for an abortion. Of course, I was taken aback by this decision. I was stunned to say the least. Here am I preparing myself to become a Dad and now this. I begged and pleaded with her to reconsider, but she said no. I asked her why the sudden change of heart? And she said that she is not yet ready to become a mother. She also added that she has her own life to live, places to see and go. "The mothering of a child would conflict with my plans" she said. "I'm sorry" is what she told me. Now, I'm pro-life, but also pro-choice and so I had to let it go. Her decision to abort this child also affected our relationship. We broke up immediately after.


Looking back at the whole situation years later, I wonder if I acted right. Yes, she was the one carrying this child, but I was responsible for her pregnancy. Meaning that, the decision to either abort or not to abort this child, should've been mutually agreed or dis-agreed. Therefore my question is: Since a man is responsible for impregnating a woman, should the woman proceed with an abortion even if her partner disapproves? In other words, what happens if he says no and she says yes?

Columnist: The Royal Enoch