Discernment vs fear: How to distinguish the two

One thing that I have become privy to is the fact that as I have gotten older, I have gained more inhibitions and have become more fearful. Because I know God, I realize that I am never totally in control; however, in learning myself, I’m learning that I despise situations where I feel completely out of control, i.e my struggle with anxiety attacks, fear of flying, not knowing how to swim etc…

I’m originally from New York and taking the train was once a part of my daily routine, when I was in college. I was too young and too self-unaware to be in tuned with many of the things that I am in tuned with now. I now live in serene Maryland and recently accepted a new job offer in Washington DC. I have the option of driving about an hour in dense traffic to get to the city. Or take the train, which is about a 15 minute commute. Obviously, I chose the latter!

I find that the train system in Washington DC is far different than that of New York. There are often more pressing safety concerns that have people uncomfortable here. Last year, sadly, there was a lady who passed away because of a smoky stalled train in DC.

In my opinion, the train rides in DC are far less smooth than that of New York; they are often more bumpy and noisy; I don’t know if I am just more aware of myself and my surroundings now, but I often find myself uneasy on the trains in a way that I never was in New York.

My loved ones in the area have also cautioned me to avoid the train line in which I take going to work, because it is notorious for accidents, shootings, delays and the like. Needless to say, I’ve been a little on edge while commuting to work. But there are perks of taking the train– I don’t have to worry about parking in the congested city, I get more exercise in walking, and I get to work much faster.

Yesterday, I was on the train and we were overhead when the train suddenly stopped. The trains out here have the tendency to tilt to the side, which makes me very uneasy. I was suspended in the air, sideways, and had absolutely no control over it. I kept dwelling on 2 Timothy 1:7- “God didn’t give us the spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.”

The conductor came on the intercom and said we would be moving momentarily. When we began to move, the train began to make a loud noise and then it stalled. If I may be honest, the fear that I felt seemed larger than the scripture I was reciting. The train did that for a few minutes before we began moving smoothly again.

In the midst of that uncertainty, people became ancy and I could hear some comments about how unsafe they felt. Was the train about to break-down? Would we be stranded? By this time, because other people looked concerned, I became all the more concerned. I was grateful to finally make it to my destination. That train ride left me uneasy.

One thing that I have become privy to is the fact that as I have gotten older, I have gained more inhibitions and have become more fearful. Because I know God, I realize that I am never totally in control; however, in learning myself, I’m learning that I despise situations where I feel completely out of control, i.e my struggle with anxiety attacks, fear of flying, not knowing how to swim etc…

I’m originally from New York and taking the train was once a part of my daily routine, when I was in college. I was too young and too self-unaware to be in tuned with many of the things that I am in tuned with now. I now live in serene Maryland and recently accepted a new job offer in Washington DC. I have the option of driving about an hour in dense traffic to get to the city. Or take the train, which is about a 15 minute commute. Obviously, I chose the latter!

I find that the train system in Washington DC is far different than that of New York. There are often more pressing safety concerns that have people uncomfortable here. Last year, sadly, there was a lady who passed away because of a smoky stalled train in DC. In my opinion, the train rides in DC are far less smooth than that of New York; they are often more bumpy and noisy; I don’t know if I am just more aware of myself and my surroundings now, but I often find myself uneasy on the trains in a way that I never was in New York. My loved ones in the area have also cautioned me to avoid the train line in which I take going to work, because it is notorious for accidents, shootings, delays and the like. Needless to say, I’ve been a little on edge while commuting to work. But there are perks of taking the train– I don’t have to worry about parking in the congested city, I get more exercise in walking, and I get to work much faster.

Yesterday, I was on the train and we were overhead when the train suddenly stopped. The trains out here have the tendency to tilt to the side, which makes me very uneasy. I was suspended in the air, sideways, and had absolutely no control over it. I kept dwelling on 2 Timothy 1:7- “God didn’t give us the spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.” The conductor came on the intercom and said we would be moving momentarily. When we began to move, the train began to make a loud noise and then it stalled. If I may be honest, the fear that I felt seemed larger than the scripture I was reciting. The train did that for a few minutes before we began moving smoothly again. In the midst of that uncertainty, people became ancy and I could hear some comments about how unsafe they felt. Was the train about to break-down? Would we be stranded? By this time, because other people looked concerned, I became all the more concerned. I was grateful to finally make it to my destination. That train ride left me uneasy.