Some writers and philosophical thinkers have sought to equate the ways of the African politicians and their allies to the wisdom of the legendary spider. As the spider’s intrigues never end, so do games played by politicians. This writer brings you more wisdom from the African pot.
Hearses are used for conveying the dead but in Ghana, ambulances are rather used for carrying the dead.
When you criticise a bad government policy or an errant government appointee, you are instantly made a registered member of the opposition party, because party supporters are expected to be mum on every bad government policy.
In Ghana, when the traffic light shows red, it means accelerate. Little wonder Ghana has been reputed to have the second highest accident rate in the whole wide world!
When you hear the expression ‘there is no cause for alarm’ know that you have to take cover ASAP, or else calamity would befall you in no time.
No problem means, there is a huge problem.
In Ghana, every morning is good so the first thing anybody who meets you in the morning says to you is “good morning”. So whether you are in a happy mood or mourning the death of your beloved, you are expected to have a good morning.
In Ghana and many other African countries except maybe SA, if you want to break the law with impunity, just join the ruling party.
If you want to win a good position in the society, just join the ruling party.
If a public official tells a lie, it is a taboo to call it as such, so you are expected to say “the person is being economical with the truth”. This actually encourages politicians and other public officials to lie with impunity.
Civil society organisations are broadly a group of non-governmental organisations, which are very critical in bringing a party to power.
If you want development in your constituency or area, just pray for the death of a member of parliament (MP), because a by-election could just turn your area into a model in the society.
If you want to be rich overnight, just sing the praise of the leaders and your doors to riches are automatically opened.
A council of state is a group of party sympathisers who ensure that the President does not hear any bad news in the society.
The phrase “development partners” simply means western interests who aid the politicians in milking the ordinary people of our continent dry. Truth and honesty are a taboo in Ghana and the continent at large. If you doubt this one, please listen to campaign messages from now till December 2008 polls.
A social commentator is a person who jumps from one media platform to the other defending bad government or opposition party policies, because in the Ghanaian context, a social commentator is a person who does not have a meaningful job.
Politicians in the Ghanaian context are all magicians. Just watch, their salaries are horrible, but they lead the most extravagant lives, courtesy ‘their friends.’
In Ghana, every newspaper is called Graphic not only because the latter was the first newspaper to be launched in the country, but also because, many of the other newspapers have refused to stake a claim in the newspaper industry.
When you go for an interview for a job, one of the very critical questions that you are expected to answer is “where do you come from?” This question scores at least 80 percent in especially public sector job interviews, because ethnicity and tribal affiliation are directly proportional to increased performance on the job. Little wonder our Motherland is always developing backwards?
More intrigues from our Motherland to come your way soon.
By Kwabena Mprah Jnr Email: kmprah@gmail.com
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