Ken Agyapong: The vulgar politics of exposed genitals & bad-mouthing - Part 3

Sat, 13 Feb 2016 Source: Kwarteng, Francis


In Ghana freedom of speech has gone to the dogs. There are in fact many Ghanaians who think freedom of speech, freedom of the press, freedom of conscience, and our dubious democratic capitalism give them the license to open their traps anyhow and unpack their bacterial and viral nonsense without so much as a high regard for public decency, self-respect, and decorum. Both Afia and Ken are guilty of this, but more so of Ken given his stature as a legislature.

Granted, their lack of respect for the doctrine of public diplomacy is not merely a casual symptom of public decay per se, but rather a causative intrinsicality of anomie itself. That is, their behavior in the public space constitutes a normative fixture of the institutional bias of Ghana’s uncritically imported democratic culture.

Recently, the National Media Commission’s Chairman Kwasi Gyang-Apenteng has formally acknowledged the seriousness of the problem and how Afia’s and Ken’s defamatory insults in the public space and their self-conceited media wars are casting a pall over journalistic ethical standards and freedom of the press as well as of speech.

In other words they (Afia & Ken) are not unique in this sweeping indictment. Having said that, let us try and see how Ken variously manifests himself in the depraved DNA of the Ghanaian public character:


The publicity stunts pulled by lawyer Maurice Ampau against the background of Asamoah Gyan’s alleged sodomizing of Sarah Kwablah in the full glare of the media represent model instances of what it actually means for a lawyer to idolize his exposed genitals in Afia’s hippo-mouth. The unserious tough-talking lawyer Ampau is yet to produce the bodies of Castro and Janet Bandu.


The quack prophesier Kweku Bonsam failed to use his powers to physically locate or identify Anas Aremeyaw Anas. And for this reason, he made a public offer to anyone who could help him trace Anas.

Apparently, he had been so deeply impressed with Anas’ investigative exposé on judicial corruption as to make him think he needed to perform certain rituals in order to protect him from his enemies, perhaps in accordance with a specific augury to that effect revealed through his oracle. Kweku Bonsam could not also use his powers to charm the kind of model-looking women he always wanted for wives. He had to appear on radio to make a sympathetic appeal to the public to help him gain direct access to his kind of model-looking woman.


Asiedu Nketia (General Mosquito), Koku Anyidoho, and other leading figures in the executive hierarchy of the NDC chased George Boateng, Mr. John Mahama’s potential rival in the presidential primaries, to the political oblivion of an insane asylum. It has however been speculated that the NDC leadership paid him off to keep him quiet, thus cajoling him to stay away from Mr. Mahama and the primaries.

George Boateng happens to be the transmogrified punching-bag versions of Paul Afoko, Kwabena Agyapong, and Sammy Crabbe of the NPP. But the story does not end there. Then also Samia Nkrumah also alleged that Mr. Ivor Greenstreet bought the delegates who, in turn, voted massively for him. Führer Akufo-Addo was alleged to have done same. Universal bribing of delegates and more particularly of the electorate before and during general elections is what misguided and many well-educated Ghanaians call democracy.

Notwithstanding the above, President Mahama’s government is generally not doing well but Führer Akufo-Addo, his potential rival, has not proven to be a better substitute for or alternative to the man he is so desperately trying to unseat, either. Führer Akufo-Addo is fighting President Mahama in the shadows just as Fulanis are fighting Ghanaians in the open. Ghanaians then have the biggest dilemma to unknot as the 2016 general elections draw nigh.

Finally, Mugabe Maase says Führer Akufo-Addo will die before the general elections. Rev. Owusu Bempah also says President Mahama will die. If this is true, what are the presidential candidates of a likely third force coalition waiting for? A third political force is a far more likely alternative or better mediating choice than either of the dead horses in the nation’s entrenched duopoly.


These controversial characters are actually Kennedy Agyapong appearing in many disguises:

Ghanaian Shiites and Sunnis “fight” over the fate of the Gitmo 2. Ghanaian Christians and Muslims battle out over the fate of the Gitmo 2.

Sheikh Ustaz Sham-un Jibril says President Mahama will lose the elections. Prophet Dr. Agyeman Prempeh, on the other hand, thinks President Mahama has the potential to win the elections.

Archbishop Duncan-Williams prays for the Ghanaian Cedi on behalf of the NDC.

Rev. Mensah Otabil appropriates the mouth of God for partisan politics on behalf of the NPP.

Bishop Obinim insults Rawlings. Kweku Bonsam advises Bishop Obinim to apologize to Rawlings.

Bishop Obinim says he can transform himself into either a snake or a dog and bite his enemies. Christian organizations come out strongly against Obinim’s charlatanry. Then also he sleeps adulterously with Gifty Pokou, one of his junior pastors’ wives, and sees nothing wrong with it. He also claimed to have crippled and made Gifty’s child mad. And he calls himself “the apple of Jesus’ eye.”

Kweku Bonsam makes the case that T.B. Joshua is fake, that he killed Pres. John Atta Mills and that he will petition Pope Francis to call him [T.B. Joshua] to order.

Dag Heward-Mills does not see anything objectionable with oral sex between married couples.

Prophet Nicholas Osei (“Kumchacha”), the founding leader of Heaven’s Gate Ministry International, threatens to beat Kweku Bonsam to a pulp until he succeeds in exorcizing the devil from him.

Odifuo Kwabena Tawiah says Ghanaian politicians will sacrifice children for the 2016 general elections.

The apocalyptic prophesier Rev. Isaac Owusu-Bempah has told the world that some persons close to Führer Akufo-Addo intend to kill him. Rev. Bempah threatens to behead Kweku Bonsam.

The government welcomes Dr. Abu Ameenah Bilal Philips (née Dennis Bradley Philips), the spiritual father of the Gitmo 2, to Ghana.

The Ghana Police Service blocks some major roads for Pastor Chris Oyakhilome’s passage.

Nana Ampadu, Ofori Amponsah, Aziziga, Jr., Lord Kenya, K.K. Kabobo…become pastors and evangelists.

Thieves steal from the strong room of Antoa Nyame…


We will not volunteer an answer because it is a rhetorical question. More so Suge Knight for instance, ex-CEO of Death Row Records who is now in court on murder charges, once proclaimed on national television that he was not a role model for the American youth. Rather ironically, he chose Jesus Christ as a role model for the American youth. Which Jesus did he refer to?

Was it the Jesus orthodox Jews never acknowledge? The meek Jesus who loved children, the one rapper Kanye West sang about so delightfully and controversially in “Jesus Walks”? The self-confident Jesus who stood up against Roman corruption and pharisaical tyranny? Or the man who sacked the temple, the one Reza Aslan called a “zealot”? Was he the historical Jesus or the Biblical Jesus? Knight did not exactly say any of these.

Perhaps, his primary reason for evading the question in the first place had to do with the perceived imperfection or incorruptibility of man. But, the profile of his own violent past and of the culture of real-life violence and gang-star rap his music label and artistes promoted could explain the illusive complexity of his telegenic response, a view not lost on us. Then the Jesus he may have referred to did not share his brand of rap sheet, violent projections, and gang-star radicalism. Neither was Jesus a producer of the class of gang-star rap he promoted nor was he a dreadful public figure that Knight was and is.

On the other hand, as far as Knight’s understanding of human incorruptibility is concerned the frankness and projective bluntness of his evasive response potentially buried any sense of introspective tendency toward sanctimonious self-importance, opinionatedness, and arrogance, all of which he may have harbored. That is to say, Ken and Afia are the very antithesis of Knight’s philosophical pontifications insofar as the Christological humanizing of model mortality.

In the end what Knight seems to be saying, in effect, is that there is no such thing as a “role model” in the corrupt bones of human beings and that such a model threshold properly belongs in the realm of paranormality. Against this background, we move to acknowledge the corruptible humanity of Afia and Ken. However this acknowledgement does not, in and of itself, absolutely exonerate them from the grudging oversight of public reprimand and self-flagellation.

On the other hand the fact of Afia calling Ken “an idiot” is an interesting one. This may confirm Ahmed Simba Toure’s claim that Ken is “an elderly man with little brains.” And also when one acknowledges that Ken’s bed-wetting and philandering tongue is his personality signature it then becomes eloquently clear why Afia will say to him: “I defecate in your mouth.” Now we know the provenance of the foul exposed genitals of Ken’s endarkened gingivitis-mouth and its toxic waste products.

We also now know that Afia is strategically deploying her bed-wetting and philandering hippo-mouth, not the infamous cleavage of her intrusive and omniscient backside, as the point of defecation contact with the exposed genitals of Ken’s bed-wetting and philandering slimy mouth.

There is no doubt in our minds that Ken loses to become an agent of influence in our society because he has become a grotesque caricature of himself.

Such Orwellian characters are therefore agents of negative influence.

We shall return with the concluding part: “Ken Agyapong: The Vulgar Politics Of Exposed Genitals & Bad-Mouthing 4.”

Columnist: Kwarteng, Francis