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Carrying a baby while in SHS: A school girl's experience

Teenage Pregnancy Teenagers should focus on their education so as to avoid unwanted pregnancies

Wed, 21 Apr 2021 Source: Elizabeth Amissah

Despite peer influence to cause abortion, and taking into account that I was in my 2nd year in senior high school, I still considered carrying my baby and walked on the four corners of the school than to cause abortion.

I wouldn’t say carrying a baby and still remaining a student at the senior high level is fun, neither do I say anyone in my shoes should listen to her friends to procure an abortion. Nonetheless, it is worth bringing forth another human being into this wonderful life.

I got pregnant in my second year of senior high education. I met this guy at entertainment who showered praises upon me. He made me felt I was the most beautiful girl on campus. His praises made me win miss Malaika although I had not contested one. In my mind I was miss Malaika. Very soon miss Malaika became my nickname. The guy and I never missed any date we proposed. The Science lab served as De Breeze beach for us. We relaxed there and enjoyed each other.

April 5 and 8 have expired and yet I have not had my blood flow. It was April 15 and I had still not had my menstruation. Immediately I sensed danger. I knew there was something new happening though I wasn’t sure what it was. I flowed my bestie everything; my affair with Joe on campus and the fact that we have had sex. My bestie supported the idea that I got myself a pregnancy test. She added, 'it is only after the test that we can confirm that you’re pregnant or not’.

One afternoon after school, I managed to mingle with the day students, sneaked out to grab the pregnancy test device. After conducting the test myself with Doreen, the name of my bestie who doubled up as my nurse, I realized at once that I was pregnant. The test was positive. It was red.

It’s only less than a week and the news is all over campus. My pregnancy had become the topic for the term. Some students gathered to always discuss me. Those individual students who came to me suggested I aborted the baby of which I did otherwise.

Upon advice to use abortion pills, and the fact that it was the only way to secure a bright future, I was left confused. In my lonely place, something struck me not to listen to my friends. I said to myself that I was determined to carry my baby. I wasn’t going to quit school either. I also knew the decision I had taken wasn’t going to be easy though. I had nine months of torture to go. I had got myself prepared to stand firm despite my growing critics.

Being pregnant as an SHS student is never an easy thing. By the third month of pregnancy, I had already lost all my friends. No one was there to at least give me emotional support. Teachers regarded me as prostitute, an aimless girl who was wasting national resources. As for my guy, although he had accepted responsibilities for the pregnancy, as for emotional support, he was far away.

In class, I remained dumb. Never did I speak. Even when I did not understand any concept, I had to keep quiet. Although I was stigmatized, I remained strong. I never changed my decision not to cause abortion following its effects.

The consequences that followed abortion alone did not encourage me to consider abortion when things became tougher. I once read in the news paper that a girl died after causing abortion. I wasn’t ready to die. Neither was I ready to damage my womb. I had also read from books that causing abortion could damage the womb.

I was also aware that should I have commit abortion, I would have killed someone. These deterred me from considering abortion. In the first place, I knew the mistakes I had made.

Should I have listened to advise, I wouldn’t have ended up that way. I knew that those pieces of advice were for my own good and should I have listened, I wouldn’t have ended up as a teenage mother. At that time, I only considered my sexual feelings and wanted to satisfy them.

I could have prevented this pregnancy if I abstained from sex and controlled my sexual feelings when Joe was pouring praises on me. In the situation when I couldn’t abstain from sex, the use of contraceptives could have prevented the pregnancy, I did not employ that one too.

I employed none of these and so I got pregnant. I suffered emotionally, mentally and physically. This however did not make me consider dropping out from school. I persevered. I have this for you, my dear girls in SHS now.

My dear ladies in SHS now, I am using this opportunity to reach you in order to share my experience with you. Perhaps, you may learn something from it. Stay focused my dear, have a plan for your future. Note that men are always around to make life whole, but not when you’re in school. Do not think that your parents hate you when they are always giving you pieces of advice.

Listen to advice, sleep when told to sleep. Sex is for married people. In the situation when you have had sex and got pregnant, do not commit abortion. It is murder. Be happy to bring forth new life into this life. Have a future, stay away from sex. I remain your young mother.

Columnist: Elizabeth Amissah