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Opinions Sat, 8 Oct 2011

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Poem: Netiquette On Ghanaweb, An Ode And Pun

By Kwesi Atta Sakyi

Ghanaweb,

Where many seasoned writers are bled

And many pseudo-writers are bred

Are they all seeking their bread?

Ghanaweb,

Where you go to hold your breath

Encountered nasty critics and you sped?

In the butchery of Ghanaweb, none is spared

Ghanaweb,

Where many articles are misread

Where most readers are misled

Half truths, falsehoods and fabrications are fed

Ghanaweb,

The miscreants sit back with glee

While unpleased fans flee

Only thick-skinned golfers tee

Ghanaweb,

Where faint-hearted columnists dread

Diasporeans are linked in on the web

With homestayers who never cared

Ghanaweb,

Where teeming ruthless critics roost

Is their criticism a ruse?

Hardly have they a book cover blurb

Yet, vociferous vituperations galore they are heard

I suggest their pointless criticisms be on the curb

And academic decorum and decency upheld

Ghanaweb,

Where I’ll summon the internet netiquette police on the web

To round up riff raffs on the kerb

Clearly and unambiguously they are heard

My plaintive pleas to that herd makes me red

I wish I had a cure and a herb

To eschew tribal diatribe and rancor shed

Are these fans of bickering Croats or Serbs?

Hope they have heard or read

Hope they are nerds

To unravel this parody and satire

A pep-talk on the curt

To Ghanaweb if they are wed,

To keep inviolate sacred vows said and read

Ghanaweb,

If they go to Sind, should they sin or they sinned?

If they see a Sikh, do they get sick or they sicked?

If they are friends with Singh, do they sing or they singed?

Better not to wear a loud tie or sing out of tune on the web

For unpleasant verbiage and verbs

They get cursed

By Kwesi Atta Sakyi

Columnist: Sakyi, Kwesi Atta

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