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Fatherhood, a blessing or a curse?

Fathers Day 2File Photo

Mon, 18 May 2020 Source: Thomas Kobby

Once I was reclining in my chair one hot afternoon, fidgeting with my phone, i chanced on a very interesting story. Below are excerpt from the story. It goes like this; " On the day God created fathers, an angel of the Lord stood in the background and watched. "Lord", the angel quizzed; " are you sure you know what you are doing? If children are so close to the ground, why are you making fathers so high up?

After all, they will have to kneel down if they ever shoot marbles with their children. They will have to lean way over to tuck them into bed at night, and they will have to bend so far down to kiss them? The Heavenly father then said, " Don't worry, i know exactly what I am doing. If i did not make fathers so high, what would children have to look up to? Haha......a simple but very provocative question by the Heavenly father.

The research on fatherhood is indisputable. According to the cambridge dictionary, fatherhood is the state of being a father. When it comes to fathering a child, anyone can do that, but being a responsible father takes a lifetime. Fathers have a pertinent duty to play in the social, cognitive, and emotional development of their wards. An involved father is one who is engaged, available and responsible.

He is sensitive and supportive, nurturing and affectionate, and comforting and accepting. Studies have shown that, when fathers show affection and support to their children, it greatly affects the child's social development and also bestows an overall sense of well_being and self-confidence. Whereas the mothers role is also very crucial, research shows that the most influential impetus in a child's emotional health is how involved the father is in a child's care. Fathers love is one of the greatest influences on personality development.

A fathers role in the family is a pivotal one, it comes with so much blessings and if care is not taken, curses as well. Delving deeper into the Bible, one will realise that one of the responsibilities of a father is spiritual leadership. Apostle Paul writes in Ephesians 6:4; " Fathers, do not exasperate your children, instead, bring them up in the discipline of the instruction of the Lord. From the above verse, we can deduce that fathers are suppose to provide discipline and instruction and also to make sure that as men, they are spiritual leaders in their homes. If they are not spiritual leaders in their homes, then they are shirking a very pivotal responsibility God has entrusted them with.

The father is called upon to be a protector of the family, and to be an epitome of Christ's love by being loving towards the children's mother. He is also to be strong in the faith and to bring the children up knowing right from wrong. Obviously, a father is neither an anchor to hold us back nor a sail to take us there but a guiding light whose love shows the children the way. Praying and providing are also another core aspect of a father's involvement in the family. Fathers are the key! therefore, if things are not right in the home, chances are that it's because they are not right. A father's presence in the home should promote inner growth and strenght in the family, as well as inspiring and motivating members in the family to identify and fulfill their God given talents and gifts.

As i prepare to bring my write up to a conclusion, fatherhood is not a curse but a blessing. And it can only become a blessing depending on how you take full charge of your responsibilities as a father. Don't always forget that; being a father is like shaving. No matter how good you shaved today, you have to do it again. Fatherhood is not something to be taken for granted or joke with, it's a long_term responsibility and must be fulfilled at all cost.

I will like to finally end my article with this popular quote by Ian Morgan Cron; " A child needs a father to show him or her how to be in the world. He or she needs to be given swagger, taught how to read a map so that they can recognise the roads that lead to life and the paths that lead to death, how to know what love requires and where to find steel in the heart when life makes demands on us that are greater than we think". Be a responsible father!

Columnist: Thomas Kobby