Dating is not prostitution - Counselor Adofoli

Marriage is not a business or investment venture for profit. The aim of dating someone is to find out if they are the right person to get married to. It is not called Dating if the focus is to sleep with someone for money, but rather prostitution. And we need to be clear about that. Don’t confuse the two.

It is very common to find guys in relationships who claim they are dating but their focus is to have fun or are in for sex. Lots of ladies are in such relationships and the focus is not marriage, but they are dating the guy just for his money, or to meet her needs. When you do that, it is not called Dating but rather Prostitution.

Lots of relationships have no respect, regard or trust because of this behaviour. Guys get an erection just by seeing or talking to any lady they meet. Whilst ladies don’t mind sleeping or flirting with any guy they believe has money or can meet one or two needs. People's character cannot stand the sight of beauty or money.

That is why they tell you, they love you yet they don’t respect you. That is why they claim they love you yet they don’t trust you. They are simply saying you have a bad character and they won’t wish to settle down with you one day in marriage.

If you want the man for just his money and you don't care sleeping with him, just let him know you want to get into the business of prostitution with him. It will help to draw lines, not to get emotions involved. If you want her for just sex, let her know so she won’t chase you for marriage. Don’t pretend to be dating and act differently. Don't create what does not exist, when you do that, you get yourself into more trouble.

If you are studying him for marriage, it is called Dating. Remember he is not your husband yet. And you are not his wife either. You are just candidates or boyfriend and girlfriend. Remember you are not committed; you are not responsible for each other’s upkeep. You are not responsible for each other's sexual needs.

This is the period to find out if they are in your life because of love or their needs? If the one you are studying truly loves you? Whether they truly care about you? You don’t have to beg them to call you. You won't have to beg them to return your calls or gestures. Their actions speak what is in their heart. At the end of the dating period, you should be able to draw a good conclusion on whether it is love or not.

You won't have to beg them to care about you because to love is to care. You won't have to demand. You don't have to complain about them not serving or giving you. You have zero expectations because you don't know them and that is why you are studying them to know if they are who they claim to be.

If you choose to go into Prostitution and hide behind Dating, remember that is business and not charity. You have no rules defined so when things go wrong, don't cry foul. Every profession has its kind of risks, when it comes to prostitution, it has its own too, it is not a legal trade in most countries, for that matter you are on your own and there is no law to protect you in such a trade and what goes on there.

It’s illegal for a prostitute to report to the law enforcement in a country where prostitution is illegal, when things go wrong. You can't report a man because he didn't pay what you agreed on. You can't report her because she didn't let you have your way the way you wanted it. Why? Because illegal trade goes wrong.

Sex is not created by God for business, there are better ways of making it in life or getting your needs or money than selling your body. Let's do the right thing. Let's say NO to what is wrong. Let's date right. Let's marry right. Let’s build the right society, let's create a better world. A world that chooses right over wrong.

In conclusion, "So let’s not get tired of doing what is good. At just the right time we will reap a harvest of blessing if we don’t give up" - Galatians 6:9 (NLT).

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