Dear GhanaWeb: I’m in love with the rapist

Dear GhanaWeb,

I know this may sound absurd, and in fact, it is an absurd situation I find myself in now.

I hold that day as memorable because it never felt like a rape to me; he made love to me instead.

I do not want to discredit my husband’s sexual performance, but the rapist gave me the best sex I have ever had in my 3 years of marriage.

He wore a white shirt, black jeans, matching the color of his shirt with his footwear, and a balaclava. His scent is stuck in my brain, and I feel like I can smell him everywhere I go.

I know I should have cried and lost it, but immediately he stroked my tummy with the gun he held, I felt something, and every bit of what transpired was nothing but fantastic.

I almost pulled him back when he was leaving, but I couldn’t. Also, I do not feel the need to tell my husband about it.

My current issue has affected my sexual interactions with my husband. I would rather yearn for the rapist anytime my husband is with me.

Every night when my husband is on his business journey, I lie in bed and expect the man to barge in.

As much as I want him, I do not want to be with him, but I can’t control how that night has occupied my head.

How do I get over this rapist? I need a way out, please.

Dear GhanaWeb is a relationship and lifestyle advice column by GhanaWeb where the GhanaWeb audience responds to your questions and problems about relationships at home, work, and beyond. Share yours with GhanaWeb at features@ghanaweb.com: