Dear GhanaWeb: I married my wife to return a favour, not out of love and I am now in a fix

Dear GhanaWeb,

I’ve known my wife for 15 years. We dated for eight years and have been married for 7 years. Our relationship started right from senior high school.

She comes from a family that does pretty well financially, so during those days in high school, she paid my fees and supported me with daily feeding sometimes.

She’s the reason I was able to complete senior high school without struggling. She was my peace. I lost my dad when I was a child. My mother and I struggled, and we could barely feed ourselves.

She had the means of going to the university; I didn’t, so she bought my forms and paid the majority of my fees while we studied together. She actually contributed to the man I am today.

We got married exactly two years after university, I was working, and so was she. My wife was so kind and down-to-earth, despite being rich.

But something happened. While doing my national service, I met a lady I would have loved to marry, but I didn’t want to disappoint my current wife, so I tried not to let my love for the lady get in the way until I settled down.

It’s been 7 years, and my heart still beats for that lady. I don’t feel I love my wife enough. I’m doing so well for myself now that I can take care of everyone I want.

I feel I married her to express my gratitude for helping me in life, not love. I’ve been dating the lady secretly for over two years now.

I’m not happy. The lady and I are still together, but she wants marriage because she wants her own family. I want a family with her as well because she’s the one I love.

How do I go about this without hurting my wife in the long run? I sincerely don’t love her. I’m just with her because I feel I owe her for everything she did for me.

I’ve bought some properties in her name. When she found out, she thought I bought them because I love her. I did that to compensate her for being there for me.

We have three kids, and I don’t want to disappoint the children either. It’s not about money anymore; I want love. What should I do now? I need your advice.

FG/AE

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