Dear GhanaWeb: My boyfriend took everything he ever gave me after our breakup

Dear GhanaWeb,

I never imagined that the end of my relationship would leave me feeling this empty, not just emotionally, but physically as well.

I was in a relationship with my boyfriend for two years, and to be honest, our biggest issue from the very beginning was a male friend of mine who lives abroad.

We were very close before he travelled, and although we almost dated at some point, nothing happened before he left. So when I started dating my boyfriend, this friend was already out of the country.

However, my boyfriend never liked him. He was always suspicious, constantly complaining, and repeatedly asking me to cut him off.

Almost every serious argument we had during those two years was because of this same issue. I kept assuring him that nothing was going on, but he never believed me. At the same time, I refused to end the friendship because I genuinely believed it was harmless.

Things took a turn in December last year when this friend returned to Ghana. I didn’t tell my boyfriend because I knew exactly how he would react.

He would have started calling constantly, questioning me, and making things difficult. So I lied. I told him my brothers were around and that I couldn’t go out or use my phone as much.

During that period, I spent a few days with my friend, and unfortunately, something happened that I deeply regret: we became intimate.

I admit it was a mistake, something I wish I could take back. It was not planned, and I never intended for it to happen.

I thought I had buried that secret, but last Wednesday, everything came crashing down. I had locked my WhatsApp, but somehow my boyfriend gained access and saw everything: the messages, the pictures, everything.

He was heartbroken and immediately broke up with me, which I understood. I knew I had hurt him deeply.

But what I didn’t expect was what happened next.

He began taking back everything he had ever given me.

The first thing he took was the phone he bought for me, my iPhone 16 Pro Max. I had to go back to using my old iPhone XR just to manage. Then he came for the shoes and bags he bought for me on my birthday.

He also took his laptop, which I had been using, and even demanded the wigs he had given me money to buy.

It didn’t end there. He has been calling and texting, asking me to return money he gave me during the relationship. At this point, I feel like everything I had is being taken away from me bit by bit.

I won’t lie, I made a mistake, and I take full responsibility for it. But I also feel like I gave my all in that relationship. I was there for him whenever he needed me. I cooked, cleaned, supported him emotionally, and gave him my time and affection.

Now I am left wondering: if he can demand everything he gave me, can I also ask him to repay me for everything I gave him?

Is he acting out of pain, or is he deliberately trying to punish me and leave me with nothing?

FG/EB

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