Feature: In the pants of a woman

In the pants of a woman is a product that is not for everybody’s consumption. In there is a world that belongs only to them. In the pants of a woman is a pleasure that is not for everyone’s leisure. Deep down inside the pants of a woman is a private space… not a public property!

It’s amazing how others assume that the body of a woman is for their sexual pleasure, thus, must have it at all cost when they want it. You wonder if others come from Pluto when they assume that the content in the pants of every woman is for their satisfaction; even at the discomfort of the said woman.

We are living in times that make everyone exposed to a myriad of dangers clothed in human skin. Our daughters and mothers are especially exposed to people whose heads are used for everything except thinking.

From the harsh economic conditions to all the frenzy that goes on on social media, our women are now more exposed to rapists and rape apologists more than they were before.

According to a six-year statistics from the Domestic Violence and Victim Support Unit (DOVVSU) of the Ghana Police Service, 1,856 women were reportedly raped between 2011 and 2016. In 2011 alone, a woman was averagely raped each day of the year. Mind you, for every reported rape case, there are two or more others that were never reported for stigmatization sake!

Our society aids and abets rape. Most rapists find our society a safe haven because we hand to them a lifeline when we condemn victims and stereotype them. It will amaze you the overwhelming number of women who have had to gloss over their abuse because they couldn’t stand society’s mockery had they reported. And… that’s how society conspires with rapists to be in business!

In this 21st century, we still have so-called level-headed people writing off rape cases because victims were in skimpy clothes. Assuming that someone’s skimpy clothes is the cause of rape is like assuming that every robbery case should be excused because victims were probably flaunting their money on the street. Even if people flaunt their money, it is their money. If they expose their body, it is theirs. Robbery, just like rape, has no excuse!

Justifying a rape case because the victim was in the perpetrator’s premises is like admitting that anyone has the permission to drive away any car they see in their premises. Such a Stone Age mindset! Rape is a crime… and has no excuse whatsoever even if the victim was parading naked!

Every woman’s body is their body? it belongs to them alone. Until one is given permission, it is an abuse? a crime. Our men must know that sexual abuse has no excuse. In the pants of a woman is their privacy? deep in there is a part of them that is strictly private.

It’s about time we protected our women and children. It’s about time we made our daughters and sisters understood that no one can get into their pants without their permission. It’s high time we made them know that no one can steal the content in their pants without their consent. We need to make them know that it is a part of their body, not an extension of public property. We have to let our daughters know that trust makes them vulnerable.

It’s about time we explained to them that they can’t trust anybody any more than they trust themselves because almost every single rape case was perpetrated on the beds of those victims, at least, had an iota of trust for. Oftentimes, those they trust are the same to thrust a spear into their hearts.

Our daughters should be wary on social media. Not everyone can be a friend. Not everyone is worth engaging in a conversation. A lot of evil people are prowling around. Rapists hide behind accounts and lure others into their haven. They warm their way into their hearts and find a way of seducing them. They ply their trade so well that before they know, they are already victims.

While we protect our women, we need to empower them as well. We need to empower our girls to report rape cases. We need to strengthen our mothers to voice out any form of sexual abuse meted out to them. It is not a norm to be raped neither is it a norm to have it unreported. Our women should be strong enough not to bottle up any form of abuse!

Empowerment begins with shoving away every form of stigmatization heaped on victims. If we want to have a society where rapists and their apologists are exposed and punished, we should not verbally abuse the sexually abused. If we ever wish to live in a society which is rid of pedophiles and their kind, we should be brave enough to confront the perpetrators and not the victims.

Every woman is at risk because men whose lust has no bounds abound. Men who would pounce on anyone in skirt are all over place. No one should be allowed to walk away after selfishly abusing another because they are vulnerable. Our girls are at risk in their schools and even in our homes. Our mothers are, too. Every woman is at risk!

As much as we protect them, we should let them know that they should never be silent on any hints of sexual abuse. They should earn our confidence and not be suppressed by the fear of their abusers. When we get into the hearts of our daughters, no one can “break” into their pants.

In their pants is a home. Only a burglar breaks in!

The writer is a playwright and Chief Scribe of Scribe Communications (www.scribecommltd.com), a writing company based in Accra. His play TRIBELESS is on Saturday, June 16th, 2018 at National Theatre.