Feature: Taking a love detour (confessions of a lesbian)

Now before you start to say anything to judge the character in our issue for this week’s column, kindly take a minute to read through what Felicia (actual name withheld) suffered in the hands of men before choosing to go the ‘opposite direction’. She started, “I used to be all straight and totally into men until series of unfortunate incidents compelled me to take the back road on love; I feel I’m being judged wrongly hence the need to come all out about who I am now.

“I’ve been in several relationships (specifically 15 relationships with different men) in which I was painfully played for a complete fool. Being the real woman I was, I made sure loyalty was always key in my relationships; I never cheated, disrespected or ever denied them sex… I mean the heated version of pure African sex with a touch of sophistication. Naya, I was extremely supportive, dedicated and devoted to my men; I gave them my all and all I ever got in return were multiple stabs in the back. Feeling betrayed, bruised and broken from my fourteenth relationship, I decided to give it a break and focus on my building my entrepreneurial career.

“Then Christopher Kay Twum (actual name withheld) came around the block! Truth was, I wasn’t quite interested in him at the beginning but after seven dates and several persuasions I broke out of my cage and let him in.

“Chris was an angel, He’s God sent, He’s my soul mate” I would say whenever my parents asked how sure I was about him. Naya, Here’s a guy who lived the exact definition of every lady’s dream man; He would call me day and night just to say ‘I love you’, He would come running to my aid whenever I was ill or in pain, He always listened to me even when I made no sense at all, Just think of what every lady would expect from a man and there you’ll find Chris!

However, after three (3) years of being in a steady relationship with my assumed soul mate, I notice he made no effort to plan for our future together as man and wife. Whenever the issue of marriage was brought up, he would quickly snap at me and say, “let’s give it sometime please… let’s not rush.” Aaahh! Three (3) years down the line and you’re saying let’s not rush? Let’s not rush into which thing? Weren’t we already living as man and wife? These questions would rush to my brain whenever he acted up like that.

I re-united with an old friend of mine who later invited me to her cousin’s wedding at the beautiful Aburi gardens one Saturday. We got there very late and the ceremony was actually over but she dragged me towards the VIP seats to say hello to her cousin and her new man… and there stood my own fiancé, “Christopher Twum” I cried… everything went totally blank afterwards. How could men be this wicked? If he didn’t love me, then why did he lead me on? Why did he waste three (3) good years of my precious life? I was but an option and a useless stand by generator to this disease of a man! What a shame!

I left the Ghana for South Africa to clear my head for a few months and that was where I found my wife…Aurora Nsiah (Actual name withheld). We grew from friends to best friends in only two months. She saw me through my depression and made me a better woman… it felt like magic! I couldn’t resist her the first night she kissed me and afterwards, we couldn’t just get our hands off eachother. Our love grew deeper by the day and I’m still blown away by her total devotion to me and what we have. We flew to the states two years ago to be united in Holy Matrimony and it’s been great joy and laughter since then.

“I took a love detour and I don’t regret it. My parents think I’m a disgrace and my society thinks I’m “the devil” but I want the entire world to understand why I became this person before they go further to condemn me! I found love in a woman who gave me reasons to live after 15 men disappointed and left me for dead! … How is this a crime?”