Lifestyle: Love is not by force - Counselor Adofoli

Have you felt so much love for someone yet they don't feel the same towards you? And you think putting pressure or force on them will make them accept you?

Many people do this. When it comes to men especially some women accept your love proposal just because they are tired of your persistent disturbance, when in actual fact your presence, words and actions turn them off. Instead of running away from such pressure, the best option to them is to play by your rules or demands.

Most of these relationships often lead to hurt in the long run when you finally realize that the person in question is not real with you; that they only pretended to be in love with you and were forced to respond "I love you too". They always feel guilty saying "I miss you too", knowing they don't feel that way. This is done to avoid your reaction if the respond is otherwise. It is such a beautiful thing for someone to ask for nothing but your company, to be given permission to put a smile on your face, but you need to give them the freedom and time to accept or reject your request.

A lot of times people think all love stories should start with a "yes", but the truth is most of the beautiful ones started with a "no". I know it’s not easy for some people to open up and express what they feel for someone, sometimes they even have to risk their friendship to do that.

Love is not a business for the faint-hearted but the strong. The weak heart gets broken when their love is neither returned nor accepted, but the strong at heart can continue to love after being hurt.

Love is a gift and has to come from the heart freely. Most importantly it’s beautiful when it’s real. This is why you need to be patient with the one you want to be with, give them time but continue to love and pray for them.

If the one you want is with someone else please let them be. If they are single and available but say ‘no’ to you, your best option is to continue being a good friend and wait patiently without pressure. When you do that, you will end up with the best love story. One day, they will fall in love with you and love you more than you ever expected.

For those who can’t wait or think it is impossible to wait, know that your love is not real, so move on. When love is real, it's hard to just stop loving someone, even after they have proven to you over and over again, that they don't deserve your love.

It’s bad to force someone to love you. You can't force anyone to love you just because you are in love with them. It will be like asking the snake not to bite you because you won't bite it.

It is always better to wait for someone you love to see in you what you see in them, and to feel for you what you feel for them, than to force and get it, or else you will always have to force to keep.

In conclusion "Love does not give up. Love is kind. Love is not jealous. Love does not put itself up as being important. Love has no pride" - 1 Corinthians 13:4 (NLV).

Please share with your friends, someone out there needs this.