Lifestyle: The power of intrigue

Want to intrigue a man to capture his interest?

Then be a little more “playful” when talking to him.

Why is it that a playful response to a question, one that teases a little bit and delays the answer, yields greater fascination?

Rather than offer the answer out right, allow me to guide your mind to the answer.

Just imagine the following scenario. See if your mind naturally picks out the triggers of interest.

After pulling his sore feet from his ice skates, Jake glanced up again at the woman who had introduced herself as Judy, twice.

He fought the urge to approach her again before leaving the rink, not wanting to come on too strong or appear too desperate.

But it was all too convenient when Judy and her friend walked right in front of him, heading toward the exit.

“Hey Judy, what are the chances of getting your phone number after forgetting your name in less than ten minutes?”

Now let’s make this a “choose your own adventure” article. (Yes, I know how cheesy that sounds, but I’m trying to be playful to set a good example).

And that brings me to an interesting aside. If you ever did read one of those corny “choose your own adventure” books as a kid, you may recall just how bad the content actually was.

You couldn’t resist finishing one of those books despite the lousy writing, could you?

The natural intrigue built into the engaging nature of those books was the ingredient that kept you reading.

Hopefully, Judy has more than just intrigued working in her favor, but let’s review her options.

Option one : Judy turns. With a pleasant smile she comments, “Oh, don’t worry about it. I forget names all the time.” Digging in her purse she produces a pen and a small scrap of paper, handing it to Jake.She suggests he call her next time he’s planning some time on the ice.[No playful intrigue]

Option two : Judy keeps walking several paces before half turning with a feigned look of innocent surprise on her face, “Oh Honey, were you talking to me? It’s Jessica, not Judy.”

She allows a playful smile to slowly spread across her face…accompanied by an approving sparkle in her eye.She gives Jake a second to transition from shock to understanding as his mind quickly makes the jump.

Regaining his wits, Jake responds, “You’re cruel! I’m not sure if I want your number anymore.” He relaxes into a natural laugh.

Judy turns to her friend for a moment, prolonging the now mutually enjoyable playfulness. “What do you think? Is he cute enough for me to give him my number after forgetting my name the second I told him?”

Judy answers her own question as if her friend had already replied. “Yeah, you’re right. He doesn’t deserve my number. So he’ll have to beg me to friend him on Facebook. That is if you can remember my first and last name long enough to send me a friend request.”

Option one is nice, just not intriguing.

It lacks the playful tension that sparks interest and gives life to a relationship when it has just begun.

Playfulness is not a technique. It’s not some kind of canned method you have to force your personality to fit with. Instead, think of playfulness as an attitude which takes a unique expression from your personality.

Play around with it, literally, and see if you don’t enjoy the banter and get better results along the way.

And speaking of better results, you owe it to yourself to learn the one thing men secretly want, but they could never ask for directions.