I’ve always been the type that has tried to please everyone all of the time, even if it meant making myself unhappy doing it… even if it meant going against my moral values. My parents, My friends, Now my husband, and my kids controlled my every being.
I’ve been married for 10 years to my husband and we have 3 children. When we first married, we were on the same page. We worshipped together, we tried to live according to God’s word, we tried to raise our kids to do the same. That lasted for about a year after we married.
A year into our marriage, he stopped going to church and he even tells our kids it’s okay if they don’t want to go. Of course they’d rather stay at home in bed on Sunday mornings. So most of the time, I travel to church alone.
My bigger issue is that I feel like I’m carrying the load for the both of us spiritually. He has no faith. I’m at my breaking point. I feel like everything that I’m waiting on God for, my husband is blocking.
Recently, I was offered a job which I feel was an answer to my prayer. My husband however feels like it would be a complete waste of time.
This isn’t the first time he has talked me out of a blessing I’ve prayed for. I’m starting to feel like I need to consult with him before I even pray.
Last week, we had the biggest argument over tithes. Money has been a little tight in our household lately. But that didn’t stop me from tithing. I paid my tithes as usual. He had a fit! I believe that God will provide no matter what just as He always has. My husband on the other hand believes that I am crazy.
I pray daily for him to return to God, but I’ve been praying that prayer for 9 years.
Don’t get me wrong… My husband is a good husband. Besides his lack of faith, I have no complaints. I love him, but is love really enough?