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Must you be in that relationship?

The writer

Fri, 13 Oct 2023 Source: Ogochukwu Nweke

Understanding the dynamics of a relationship:

Relationships, in their varied forms and structures, play an indispensable role in shaping our lives. They influence our mental, emotional, and sometimes physical well-being. Hence, it is imperative for one to ponder upon the question: Must you be in that relationship?

The importance of emotional well-being:

Your emotional well-being is paramount. Relationships should be sources of joy, support, and mutual growth. If you find yourself perpetually drained, upset, or on edge, it is a telling sign that the relationship might not be suitable for you. Emotional turbulence, more often than not, indicates deeper, unresolved issues within the relationship. Remember, while relationships entail compromise, they should never compromise your emotional health.

Values and life goals: Do they align?:

Every individual is a unique blend of beliefs, ambitions, and values. Relationships thrive when there is an alignment or at least respect for each other's values. If you find a mismatch in fundamental values or life goals that leads to frequent clashes, it might be time to reassess the longevity and sustainability of such a relationship. Harmony in core beliefs provides a solid foundation for relationships to flourish.

Boundaries and personal space:

Healthy relationships respect boundaries. Whether it is the time you wish to spend alone, with family, or pursuing a hobby, your partner should understand and respect your choices. Feeling suffocated, monitored, or controlled is not conducive to a flourishing relationship. Remember, personal space isn't a luxury; it is a necessity.

Mutual growth: Rising together:

One of the defining aspects of a fulfilling relationship is mutual growth. This growth can be intellectual, emotional, or even professional. A relationship should act as a catalyst, propelling both partners to new heights. If one finds stagnation or feels suppressed in their aspirations and dreams, it is crucial to communicate and re-evaluate.

Is the relationship equal?:

Equality in a relationship doesn't mean mirroring each other's roles. It means mutual respect and valuing each other's opinions. Decision-making should be a joint endeavour, and both partners should feel heard. A relationship where one constantly feels overshadowed or trivialised can lead to resentment and discontent.

Trust: The cornerstone:

Trust is the bedrock of any meaningful relationship. Constant doubts, fears of betrayal, or feeling the need to monitor your partner are red flags. Trust should be inherent. If it is broken, it takes immense effort to rebuild, and sometimes it might never return to its original form.

Conclusion: The path forward:

Relationships are complex, ever-evolving entities. It is essential to regularly introspect and assess whether a relationship adds value to your life. While no relationship is devoid of challenges, the overall essence should be uplifting and positive. If you find yourself constantly questioning the worth and value of your relationship, it might be time for some soul-searching. Remember, it is not about finding someone to live with but finding someone you can't imagine living without.

Source: Ogochukwu Nweke