Nigeria's Charly Boy advices ladies on difficult marriage

Veteran musician and media personality, Charly Boy on Tuesday expressed concern over single mothers struggling to survive and urged ladies to shun "irresponsible and care-free men,’’ for a joyful marriage.

Charly Boy took to social media platform and wrote, "they don't make men like they used to anymore; and women have become something else.

"Long time ago, men used to be very proud being the bread winners, the sole providers in the home but nowadays, many don’t mind being a house husband. "Women used to be seen, not heard, but now, women are the bread winners in most homes.

"They have taken over the role of men; they have become the Boss Madam, most of them, by circumstance," he said.

He continued by asking "why do some women stay in a relationship that is not going anywhere, worse off, in an abusive, psychologically draining, energy sapping relationship?

"Is it by force to stay in a relationship because the world must see you as married, or you are only tolerating your baby daddy so he can have a rethink and marry you?

"Ladies, please cut yourselves some slack, you can't find that much needed and desired happiness if you're in a relationship that is so filled with stress and despair, coupled with the child or children's responsibility you have to think of.

"You cannot afford to be lazy, don't discriminate on the kind of job you can or cannot do because of an illusionary class.

"As long as the job is not prostitution, drug peddling and trafficking in any of the vices, you must give your best at what work you find to do to earn a living,’’ the veteran said.

He added that there are stories of single parents whose children turned out very beautifully, thereby becoming reference points for good.

"I'm sure you know that children raised by single parents only turn out poorly and terribly because those parents didn't give their best or their best wasn't good enough," he said.

He then urged single parent to find a responsible father figure to model for and mentor their child.

'This does not necessarily have to be your boyfriend, it can be an uncle, a friend, someone that the child can look up to and take correction from when he or she goes off course.

"A mistake I have seen with single parents is that they turn their children to the husband they do not have, they do not discipline them when they go wrong, everything the child does is okay.

"Whether good or not, they don't put their foot down on what they know is right for the child to do. They live and raise the kids in denial and self-pity.

"This is when single parenting goes all wrong,’’ he said.

He, however, added that apart from this, nothing stops a single parent’s child from being outstanding and even going ahead to outshine regular kids. "So, the ball is in your court, whether you will choose to see your cup half empty or half full.

"I am strongly against a lady pretending to be under a man when in the real sense, though her man is not physically demised, she’s the only parent in her home," he said.