Misc Jokes
Never hire a man to do a woman's job .......
A few months ago, there was an opening with the CIA for an
assassin. These highly classified positions are hard to fill,
and there's a lot of testing and background checks involved
before you can even be considered for the position.
After sending some applicants through the background checks,
training and testing, they narrowed the possible choices down
to two men and a woman, but only one position was available.
The day came for the final test to see which person would
get the extremely secretive job. The CIA men administering
the test took one of the men to a large metal door and handed
him a gun. "We must know that you will follow your
instructions no matter what the circumstances," they
explained. "Inside this room, you will find your wife
sitting in a chair. Take this gun and kill her."
The man got a shocked look on his face and said, "You can't
be serious! I could never shoot my own wife!" Well," said the
CIA man, "you're definitely not the right man for this job
then."
So they bring the second man to the same door and hand him a
gun. "We must know that you will follow instructions no
matter what the circumstances," they explained to the second
man. "Inside you will find your wife sitting in a chair.
Take this gun and kill her."
The second man looked a bit shocked, but nevertheless took
the gun and went in the room. All was quiet for about five
minutes, then the door opened. The man came out of the room
with tears in his eyes. "I tried to shoot her. I just
couldn't pull the trigger and shoot my wife. I guess I'm not
the right man for the job."
"No," the CIA man replied. "You don't have what it takes.
Take your wife and go the hell home."
Now they're down to the woman left to test. Again they lead
her to the same door and hand her the same gun. "We must be
sure that you will follow instructions no matter what the
circumstances. This is your final test. Inside you will find
your husband sitting in a chair. Take this gun and kill him."
The woman took the gun and opened the door. Before the door
even closed all the way, the CIA heard the gun start firing,
one shot after another, for 13 shots. Then they heard
screaming, crashing, banging on the walls. This went on for
several minutes, then all went quiet. The door opened slowly,
and there stood the woman....... She wiped the sweat from
her brow and said, "You guys didn't tell me the gun was
loaded with blanks! I had to beat the son of a bitch to
death with the chair!"