Misc Jokes

headache

Joe was moderately successful in the career, but as he got
older he was increasingly hampered by incredible headaches.
When his personal hygiene and love life started to suffer, he
sought medical help. After being referred from one specialist
to another, he finally came across a doctor who solved the
problem. "The good news is I can cure your headaches, the bad
news is that it will require castration. You have a very rare
condition which causes your testicles to press up against the
base of your spine. The pressure creates one hell of a
headache. The only way to relieve the pressure is to remove
the testicles." Joe was shocked and depressed, but decided he
had no choice but to go under the knife. After the operation,
his mind was clear, but he felt like he was missing an
important part of himself. As he walked down the street, he
realized that he felt like a different person. He could make
a new beginning and live a new life. He walked past a men's
clothing store and thought, "That's what I need, a new suit."
He entered the shop and told the salesman, "I'd like a new
suit." The salesman eyed him briefly and said, "Let's see,
size 44 long?" Joe laughed, "That's right, how did you
know?". "It's my job." replied the salesman. Joe tried on the
suit, it fitted perfectly. As Joe admired himself in the
mirror, the salesman asked, "How about a new shirt?" Joe
thought for a moment and then said, "Sure!". The salesman
eyed Joe then said, "Let's see, 34 sleeve and 16 and a half
neck.". Joe was surprised, "That's right, how did you know?".
"It's my job." came the familiar reply. Joe tried on the
shirt, and it fitted perfectly. The salesman asked, "How
about new shoes?". Joe was on a roll and agreed. The salesman
eyed Joe's feet and said, "Let's see, nine-and-a-half?" Joe
was astonished, "That's right, how did you know?". "It's my
job." said the salesman again. Joe tried on the shoes and
they fitted perfectly. He walked comfortably around the shop
and the salesman asked, "How about some new underwear?" Joe
thought for a second and said, "Sure, why not." The salesman
stepped back, eyed Joe's waist and said, "Let's see, size
36." Joe laughed smugly, "No, I've worn size 34 since I was
18 years old." The shocked salesman shook his head, "You
can't possibly wear a size 34! It would press your testicles
up against the base of your spine and give you one hell of a
headache!"