Misc Jokes

Painful Flushes

A drunk man in a bar asks the bartender where the bathroom
was.

The bartender gives the man directions the man to the
bathroom.

A few minutes later, everybody at the bar hears a loud
scream from out of the bathroom and wonders what the Hell is
going on in there.

A few minutes go by and, again, everybody at the bar hears
another loud scream coming from the bathroom.

This time the bartender goes into the bathroom to
investigate what the drunk is screaming about. He knocks on
the door and asks the drunk, "What's all the screaming about
in there? You're scaring my customers!"

The drunk says, "I'm just sitting here on the toilet and
every time I try to flush it, something comes up and
squeezes the Hell out of my balls."

With that, the bartender opens up the door and looks in and
says, "Well, no wonder, you're sitting on the mop bucket!"