Misc Jokes

Write Clearly

Examples of unclear writing (Sentences taken from actual
letter received by Welfare Department in Application for
Support..)

1. I am forwarding my marriage certificate and six children.
I had seven but one died which was baptized
on a half sheet of paper.

2. I am writing the welfare department to say my baby was
born 2 years old. When do I get my money?

3. Mrs. Jones had not have any clothes for a year and has
been visited regularly by the clergy.

4. I cannot get sick pay. I have six children. Can you tell
me why.

5. I am glad to report that my husband who is missing is
dead.

6. This is my eight child. What are you going to do about
it.

7. Please find for certain if my husband is dead. The man I
am living with can't eat or drink until he knows.

8. I am very much annoyed to find that you have branded my
son illiterate. This is a dirty lie as I was married
a week before he was born.

9. In answer to your letter, I have birth to a boy weighing
ten pounds: I hope this is satisfactory.

10. I am forwarding my marriage certificate and my three
children; one of which is a mistake as you can see.

11. My husband got his project cut off two weeks ago and I
haven't had any relief since.

12. Unless I get my husband's money pretty soon, I will be
forced to lead an immortal life.

13. You have changed my little boy into a girl. Will this
make any difference.

14. I have no children as my husband is a truck driver and
works night and day.

15. In accordance with your instruction, I have given birth
to twins in the enclosed envelope.

16. I want money as quick as I can get, so I have been in
bed with doctor for two weeks and he doesn't do me any good.
If things don't improve I will have to send for another
doctor.

17. Bill Smith worked for us for six months and when he left
we were happy, we hope this help his caractor.