Misc Jokes

One For Me . . . One For You

On the outskirts of town, there was a big old pecan tree by
the cemetery fence. One day two boys filled up a bucketful of
nuts and sat down by the tree, out of sight, and began
dividing the nuts.

"One for you, one for me. One for you, one for me," said one
boy. Several
were dropped and rolled down toward the fence.

Another boy came riding along the road on his bicycle. As he
passed, he thought he heard voices from inside the cemetery.
He slowed down to investigate. Sure enough, he heard, "One
for you, one for me. One for
you, one for me." He just knew what it was. "Oh my," he
shuddered,"it's Satan
and the Lord dividing the souls at the cemetery."

He jumped back on his bike and rode off. Just around the
bend he met an
old man with a cane, hobbling along. "Come here quick," said
the boy, "you won't believe what I heard. Satan and the Lord
are down at the cemetery dividing up the souls."

The man said, "Beat it, kid, can't you see it's hard for me
to walk." When
the boy insisted, though, the man hobbled to the cemetery.
Standing by
the fence they heard, "One for you, one for me.One for you,
one for me." The old man whispered, "Boy, you've been tellin'
the truth.Let's see if we
can see the devil himself." Shaking with fear, they peered
through the
fence, yet were still unable to see anything. The old man
and the boy
gripped the wrought iron bars of the fence tighter and
tighter as they tried to get a glimpse of Satan.

At last they heard, "One for you, one for me. And one last
one for you. That's all. Now let's go get those nuts by the
fence, and we'll be done."

They say the old guy made it back to town 5 minutes before
the boy.