Misc Jokes

You're Between Baby Boomer and Generation X If . . .

1. You remember when Jordache jeans with a flat-handle comb
in the back pocket was cool.

2. Any photograph of you shows you wearing an Izod shirt
with the collar turned up.

3. You know any "Weird Al" Yankovic songs by heart.

4. You've ever rung someone's doorbell and said
"Landshark!"

5. You were once bowled over by the technological excellence
of such products as Atari, IntelliVision, TelStar and
Coleco.

6. You remember the premier of MTV-or worse yet, you
remember its predecessor, "Friday Night Videos."

7. You and your friends ever discussed having a reunion at
the end of the century and playing Prince's "1999" until you
passed out partying.

8. A predominant color in your childhood photos is plaid.

9. You remember when music that was labeled "alternative"
really was alternative, and when "alternative comedy" was
really funny.

10. You took family trips BEFORE the invention of the
minivan.

11. (Related to No. 10) You rode in the back of the station
wagon facing the cars behind you.

12. You've recently horrified yourself by using any one of
the following phrases: "You know, back when...," "When I was
your age...," or "When I was younger..."

13. Schoolhouse Rock played a HUGE part in how you learned
things like grammar, math and history. (A big hint here is if
the only way you can recite the Preamble to the Constitution
is by singing it.)

14. You ever dressed to look like someone in a Madonna,
Cyndi Lauper or Duran Duran video.

15. You remember your first kiss with someone having
happened while either "Leather and Lace" or "Crazy for You"
was playing.

16. You remember with pain the day the Green Machine hit the
streets (or the sidewalks), instantly making your Big Wheel
obsolete.

17. The age-old question "Where's the beef? " still makes
you laugh.

18. You remember when film critics raved that no movie could
ever possibly have more advanced special effects than
"TRON."

19. You had a crush on Ted the photographer on "Love Boat,"
Gage from "Emergency," or Ponch from "CHIPS."

20. Your hair at some point in time in the '80s could only
be described by saying "I was experimenting."

21. You've ever shopped at Benetton.

22. You're starting to believe that having the kids in
school year-round wouldn't be such a bad idea after all.

23. You're currently employed doing something that has
absolutely nothing to do with your college major.

24. U2 is too popular and mainstream for you now.

25. You remember trying to guess which episode of "The Brady
Bunch" it was by the first scene.

26. You had a front-row seat (i.e., blew off one or more
classes) for Luke and Laura's wedding on "GH."

27. Your parents wanted you to attend medical school, but
you decided it was pointless since Quincy got all the babes
anyway.

28. You know who shot J.R.

29. You recall when Love's Baby Soft was in every girl's
Christmas stocking.

30. This rings a bell: "My name is Charlie, and they work
for me."

31. You were unsure if Diet Coke would ever catch on.
(Related item: you were sure that "New Coke" would NEVER
catch on.)

32. You know all the words to the double-album set of the
"Grease" soundtrack.

33. You've ever had a Dorothy Hamill haircut.

34. You sat with your friends on any given Friday night
circa 1982 and dialed 867-5309 to see if Jenny was actually
there.

35. "All skate, change directions" means something to you.

36. You've ever owned a pair of rainbow suspenders like the
ones Mork used to wear.

37. You bought a pair of Vans and wanted to order a pizza in
history class so you could be just like Jeff Spicoli.
(Related item: if you've ever
smacked yourself in the head with a shoe and exclaimed, "I'm
so wasted!")

38. You owned a Preppy Handbook.

39. You were too young to see "Blue Lagoon," so you just had
to settle for the second-hand reports.

40. You remember when movies were only PG and R.

41. You learned to swim at about the same time "Jaws" came
out . . . and still carry the emotional scars to prove it.

42. You remember when your cable TV box had a sliding
selector switch . . . and your "cable remote" was connected
to the TV by CORD!

43. Your jaw would ache by the time you finished one of
those brick-sized packages of Bazooka.

44. You remember Bo and Luke Duke, Daisy, Boss Hogg,
or-worst of all-what Sheriff Roscoe's full name was.

45. Your parents paid $2,000 for a top-loading VCR that was
almost the size of a coffee table.

46. You found nothing strange about Bert and Ernie living
together.

47. You remember having a rotary phone.

48. You actually believed that Mikey, famed kid on the Life
cereal commercials, died after eating Pop Rocks and drinking
a Coke.

49. "Members Only" jackets...say no more.

50. And lastly, I'll make a song stick in your head for the
rest of the day: ... you actually remember the words to the
theme song of "The Greatest American Hero." ("BELIEVE IT OR
NOT, I'M WALKIN' ON AIR...I NEVER THOUGHT I COULD FEEL SO
FREE-EE-EE...")