Misc Jokes

Dogs don't cry.

Dogs love it when your friends
come over.

Dogs don't care if you use their
shampoo.

Dogs think you sing great.

A dog's
time in the bathroom is confined to a quick drink.

Dogs don't expect you to call when you are running late.

The later you are, the more excited dogs are to see
you"

Dogs will forgive you for playing with other
dogs.

Dogs don't notice if you call them by another
dog's name.

Dogs are excited by rough play.

Dogs don't mind if you give their offspring away.

Dogs
understand that farts are funny.

Dogs love red
meat.

Dogs can appreciate excessive body hair.

Anyone can get a good-looking dog.

If a dog is
gorgeous, other dogs don't hate it."

Dogs don't
shop.

Dogs like it when you leave lots of things on
the floor.

A dog's disposition stays the same all
month long.

Dogs never need to examine the
relationship.

A dog's parents never visit.

Dogs
love long car trips.

Dogs understand that instincts
are better than asking for directions.

Dogs understand
that all animals smaller than dogs were made to be hunted.

When a dog gets old and starts to snap at you
incessantly,you can shoot

it."

Dogs like beer.

Dogs don't hate their bodies.

No dog ever bought a
Kenny G or Hootie & the Blowfish album.

No dog ever
put on 100 pounds after reaching adulthood.

Dogs never
criticize.

Dogs agree that you have to raise your
voice to get your point across.

Dogs never expect
gifts.

It's legal to keep a dog chained up at your
house.

Dogs don't worry about germs.

Dogs don't
want to know about every other dog you ever had.

Dogs
like to do their snooping outside as opposed to in your
wallet, desk,

and the back of your sock drawer."

Dogs don't let magazine articles guide their lives.

Dogs would rather have you buy them a hamburger dinner than a
lobster one.

You never have to wait for a dog. They're
ready to go 24 hours a day.

Dogs have no use for
flowers, cards, or jewelry."

Dogs don't borrow your
shirts.

Dogs never want foot-rubs.

Dogs find
you amusing when you're drunk.

Dogs can't talk.

Dogs aren't chatty.

Dogs seldom outlive you.