Misc Jokes

Don't Play the Piccolo

A man is walking around the streets of New York one day when
he spies an old friend of his from college.

"Boris!" he yells. "I haven't seen you in ages! How have you
been?"

"Well," Boris replies. "I am the piccolo player for the
International Orchestra."

"Spectacular!" the man replies.

"It is not what you might think, my friend. We play for the
king of England, he loves the music. He says 'Fill the
instruments with gold!' and they fill the tuba with gold,
and they fill the trombone with gold, and me with the darn
piccolo.

"We play for the queen of France. She loves the music; she
says 'Fill the instruments with silver!' and they fill the
tuba with silver and they fill the trombone with silver, and
me with the darn piccolo.

"Then we play for the czar of Russia. He hates the music; he
says 'Shove the instruments up their asses!' and the
tuba doesn't fit and the trombone doesn't fit, AND ME WITH
THE DAMN PICCOLO!"