Misc Jokes

CATHOLIC PRIEST

FATHER MURPHY WAS A PRIEST IN A POOR PARISH. ONE DAY HE
ASKED FOR SUGGESTIONS ON HOW TO RAISE MONEY FOR HIS CHURCH.
ONE OF HIS PARISHIONERS MENTIONED THAT HORSE OWNERS ALWAYS
HAD MONEY. SO THE PRIEST WENT TO AN AUCTION AND BOUGHT A
HORSE. AS IT TURNED OUT THE HORSE WAS A DONKEY. HE DECIDED
TO ENTER THE DONKEY IN A RACE ANYWAY AND IT FINISHED THIRD.
THE NEXT MORNING THE SPORTS PAGE READ "FATHER MURPHY'S ASS
SHOWS"? THE ARCHBISHOP SAW THE PAPER AND WAS VERY
DISPLEASED. THE NEXT DAY THE DONKEY CAME IN FIRST AND THE
HEADLINE READ "FATHER MURPHY'S ASS OUT IN FRONT". THE
FOLLOWING DATHE THE DONKEY RACED AGAIN AND FINISHED SECOND.
THE HEADLINES READ "FATHER MURPHY'S ASS BACK IN PLACE". THE
ARCHBISHOP WAS UP IN ARMS AND FIGURED SOMETHING HAD TO BE
DONE, SO HE FORBID THE POOR PRIEST FROM ENTERING THE DONKEY
IN ANY MORE RACES. THE HEADLINE THEN READ "ARCHBISHOP
SCRATCHES FATHER MURPHY'S ASS". FINALLY, THE ARCHBISHOP
ORDERED FATHER MURPHY TO DISPOSE OF THE ANIMAL. HE WAS
UNABLE TO SELL IT, SO HE GAVE IT TO SISTER AGATHA. WHEN THE
ARCHBISHOP HEARD THIS HE DEMANDED THAT SHE GET RID OF IT. SO
SHE SOLD IT FOR TEN DOLLARS. THE HEADLINE THE FOLLOWING
MORNING READ "SISTER AGATHA PEDDLES HER ASS FOR TEN DOLLARS"
THEY BURRIED THE ARCHBISHOP THREE DAYS LATER.