Misc Jokes

Dog's Missing Tail

In a small country pub, all the patrons became quite used to
the pub owners little dog being around the bar, so were quite
upset when one day the little dog died.

Everyone met to decide how they could remember the little
dog. The decision was to cut off his tail and stick it up
behind the bar to remind everyone of the little dog's wagging
tail.

The little dog went up to heaven and was about to run
through the pearly gates when he was stopped by Saint Peter,
who questioned the little dog as to where he was going.

The little dog said "I have been a good dog - so I am going
into heaven where I belong!". Saint Peter replied "Heaven is
a place of perfection, you can not come into heaven without a
tail, where is your tail?"

The little dog explained the what had happened back on
Earth.

St. Peter told the little dog to go back down to earth and
retrieve his tail. The little dog protested that it was now
the middle of the night on earth, but St Peter would not
change his mind.

So the little dog went back down to earth and scratched on
the door of the pub until the bartender who lived upstairs
came down and opened the door.

"My goodness, it is the spirit of the little dog. What can I
do for you?" said the bartender.

The little dog explained that he wasn't allowed into Heaven
without his tail, and he needed it back.

The bartender replied "I would really like to help you, but
my liquor license doesn't allow me to retail spirits after
hours!"