Misc Jokes

Jelly Bean and Smartie

A Jelly Bean walks into a bar and starts talking to a
Smartie.

After a few beers the Smartie says "Ere, do you fancy going
to that new club in town?" and the Jelly Bean says "No mate,
I'm a soft centre, I always end up getting my head kicked
in."

So Smartie says "Don't worry about it, I'm a bit of a hard
case, I'll look after you." So Jelly Bean says "Fair enough,
as long as you'll look after me." and off they went.

After a few more beers in the club, three Lockets walk in.
As soon as he sees them, Smartie hides under a table, the
Lockets take one look at Jelly Bean and start kicking him,
punching him and generally having a laugh.

After a while they get bored and walk out. Jelly Bean pulls
his battered Jelly Bean body over to the table and wipes his
Jelly Bean blood up and turns to Smartie and says "I thought
you were going to look after me?"

"I was!" says Smartie, "But those Lockets are menthol!"