Relationship Jokes

You Never Used . . .

Sheila comes home early from work one day only to find her
husband, Mark, in bed with a woman. Sheila says "That's it,
I'm leaving and never coming back." Mark says "Don't you at
least want to hear my explanation."

Sheila shrugs and says "Fine, let's hear your story." Mark
says "I'm driving along the street when I see this young lady
in torn clothes, no shoes, all muddy and crying. I took pity
on her and asked if she would like to get cleaned up in my
house. She climbed into my truck and I brought her home.
She took a shower, I gave her the underwear that doesn't fit
you anymore, the blouse I bought you 2 years ago that you
never wore, the $150 Nike running shoes you bought but never
used - I even gave her some of the roast beef you had in the
fridge, but didn't serve to me. I showed her to the door.
She thanked me profusely. As she was about to leave she
turned around and asked me, 'Is there anything else your wife
doesn't use anymore?'"