Relationship Jokes

Personal Ad

The Metro Times in the Detroit, MI area runs a competition
for the best Personal Ad, and gives a $15 gift certificate to
a local music store as the prize. This one won in the latest
issue.

I am black and a woman. With children being slaughtered in
Rowanda, what difference does it make how big my breasts are,
how long my legs are, or how much money you or I make? To
hell with long walks, holding hands, candle lit dinners, and
all of that other crap that people never continue doing after
the first date anyway; that didn't even take place in
Cinderella (I've seen the movie). If there is a man out
there who:

isn't a crackhead or crack dealer,
isn't an alcoholic,
doesn't have any kids,
doesn't smoke,
doesn't beat women,
isn't wearing women's underwear as you're reading this
ad,
isn't a liar,
isn't looking for fun behind his wife's back,
isn't into being hit, peed on, or tied up while having
sex,
doesn't want to hit, pee on or tie me up while having
sex,
likes having sex,
CAN have sex,

is not
in jail,
on probation,
has a court date pending,

isn't a
misogynist,
racist,
classist,
elitist,
lawyer,
politician,
member of the military,
policeman (Malice Green, Rodney King),
bible boy, or
a pompous ass.

Call me!!

What you have to be is HONEST, HONEST, HONEST!!! If you're
out there, if you exist, call me. Please don't make me give
up on men.