Religion Jokes

Loch Ness Monster and the Atheist

An atheist was spending a quiet day fishing when suddenly
his boat was attacked by the Loch Ness Monster. In one easy
flip, the beast tossed him and his boat at least a hundred
feet into the air. It then opened it's mouth waiting below to
swallow them both.

As the man sailed head over heels and started to fall
towards the open jaws of the ferocious beast he cried out,
"Oh, my God! Help me!"

Suddenly, the scene froze in place and as the atheist hung
in midair a booming voice came out of the clouds and said, "I
thought you didn't believe in Me!"

"God, come on, give me a break!" the man pleaded, "Just
seconds ago I didn't believe in the Loch Ness Monster
either!"

"Well," said God, "now that you are a believer, you must
understand that I won't work miracles to snatch you from
certain death in the jaws of the monster, but I can change
hearts. What would you have me do?"

The atheist thinks for a minute then says, "God, please have
the Loch Ness Monster believe in You also.

"God replies, "So be it."

The scene starts in motion again with the atheist falling
towards the ravenous jaws of the monster. The Loch Ness
Monster folds his claws together and says, "Lord, bless this
food You have so graciously provided . . ."