Gender Jokes

Pregnancy FAQ

Pregnancy FAQ (Frequently Asked Questions)

Q: Should I have a baby after 35?
A: No, 35 children is enough.

Q: I'm two months pregnant now. When will my baby move?
A: With any luck, right after he finishes college.

Q: What is the most common pregnancy craving?
A: For men to be the ones who get pregnant.

Q: What is the most reliable method to determine a baby's
sex?
A: Childbirth.

Q: My wife is five months pregnant and so moody that
sometimes she's borderline irrational.
A: So what's your question?

Q: How long is the average woman in labor?
A: Whatever she says divided by two.

Q: Is there any reason I have to be in the delivery room
while my wife is in labor?
A: Not unless the word 'alimony' means anything to you.

Q: Is there anything I should avoid while recovering from
childbirth?
A: Yes, pregnancy.

Q: Do I have to have a baby shower?
A: Not if you change the baby's diaper very quickly.

Q: Our baby was born last week. When will my wife begin to
feel and act normal again?
A: When the kids are in college.