Misc Jokes

13 Things You Wouldn't Know Without Movies

1. It is always possible to park directly outside any
building you are visiting.

2. A detective can only solve a case once he has been
suspended from duty.

3. If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone
you bump into will know all the steps.

4. Most laptop computers are powerful enough to override the
communication systems of any invading alien civilization.

5. It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a
fight involving martial arts - your enemies will wait
patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a
threatening manner until you have knocked out their
predecessors.

6. When a person is knocked unconscious by a blow to the
head, they will never suffer a concussion or brain damage.

7. No one involved in a car chase, hijacking, explosion,
volcanic eruption or alien invasion will ever go into shock.

8. Police Departments give their officers personality tests
to make sure they are deliberately assigned a partner who is
their total opposite.

9. When they are alone, all foreigners prefer to speak
English to each other.

10. You can always find a chainsaw when you need one.

11. Any lock can be picked by a credit card or a paper clip
in seconds, unless it's the door to a burning building with a
child trapped inside.

12. An electric fence, powerful enough to kill a dinosaur
will cause no lasting damage to an eight-year-old child.

13. Television news bulletins usually contain a story that
affects you personally at that precise moment you turn the
television on.