Misc Jokes

Signs You're Showing Way Too Much 90's Mentality

* Cleaning up the dining area means getting the fast-food
bags out of the back seat of your car.

* Your reason for not staying in better touch with your
family is that they don't have E-mail addresses.

* Keeping up with sports entails adding ESPN's homepage to
your bookmarks.

* You have a "to do" list that includes entries for lunch
and bathroom breaks --and they are usually the ones that
never get crossed off.

* You have actually faxed your Christmas list to your
parents.

* Standard pick-up lines now include references to liquid
assets and capital gains.

* You consider second-day air delivery painfully slow.

* You refer to your dining room table as "the flat filing
cabinet."

* Your idea of being organized is multiple colored sticky
notes.

* Your grocery list has been on the front of your fridge so
long some of the products don't even exist any longer.

* You lecture the neighborhood kids selling lemonade on how
to improve their production and marketing
processes.

* You get all excited when it's Saturday -- and that just
means you can wear your sweats to work.

* You refer to the tomatoes grown in your garden as
"deliverables."

* You find you really need PowerPoint to explain what it is
you do for a living.

* You typically eat out of vending machines, and at the most
expensive restaurant in the city, within the same
week.

* You think that "progressing an action plan" and
"calendarizing a project" are standard and acceptable English
phrases.

* You know the people at the airport hotels better than your
next-door neighbors.

* You ask your friends to, "think out of the box" when
making Friday night plans.

* You think Einstein would have been more effective if he
put his ideas into matrix.

* You think a "half day" means leaving at 5 o'clock.

* You hear most of your jokes via E-mail instead of in
person.