Misc Jokes

How To Tell Where a Driver is From

* One hand on wheel, one hand on horn: Chicago

* One hand on wheel, one finger out window: New York

* One hand on wheel, one hand on newspaper, foot solidly on
accelerator: Boston

* One hand on wheel, cradling cell phone, brick on
accelerator: California. With gun in lap: L.A.

* Both hands on wheel, eyes shut, both feet on brake,
quivering in terror: Ohio, but driving in California.

* Both hands in air, gesturing, both feet on accelerator,
head turned to talk to someone in back seat: Italy

* One hand on latte, one knee on wheel, cradling cell phone,
foot on brake, mind on game: Seattle

* One hand on wheel, one hand on hunting rifle, alternating
between both feet being on the accelerator and both on the
brake, throwing a McDonalds bag out the window: Texas city
male

* One hand on wheel, one hand hanging out the window,
keeping speed steadily at 70mph, driving down the center of
the road unless coming around a blind curve, in which case
they are on the left side of the road: Texas country male

* One hand constantly refocusing the rear-view mirror to
show different angles of the BIG hair, one hand going between
mousse, brush, and rat-tail to keep the helmet hair going,
both feet on the accelerator, poodle steering the car, chrome
.38 revolver with mother of pearl inlaid handle in the glove
compartment: Texas female

* Four wheel drive pickup truck, shotgun mounted in rear
window, beer cans on floor, squirrel tails attached to
antenna: West Virginia

* Two hands gripping wheel, blue hair barely visible above
window level, driving 35 on the interstate in the left lane
with the left blinker on: Florida