Education Jokes

Is Hell Endothermic or Exothermic?

Dr. Schlambaugh, a senior lecturer at the Chemical
Engineering
Department,University of Oklahoma, is known for posing
questions on
final exams like: "Why do airplanes fly?"

In May a few years ago, the "Momentum, Heat and Mass
Transfer " exam
paper contained the question:

"Is Hell exothermic or endothermic? Support your answer with
proof."

Most students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's
Law or
similar. One student, however, wrote the following:

First, we must postulate that if souls exist, they must have
some mass.
If they do, then a mole of souls also must have a mass. So,
at what rate
are souls moving into hell and at what rate are souls
leaving? I think
we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it does
not leave.
Therefore, no souls are leaving.

As for souls entering Hell, let's look at the different
religions that
exist in the world today. Some religions say that if you
are not a
member of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there
are more than
one of these religions, and people do not belong to more
than one
religion, we can project that all people and all souls go to
Hell. With
the birth and death rates what they are, we can expect the
number of
souls in Hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the
rate of
change in the volume of Hell. Boyle's Law states that in
order for the
temperature and pressure in Hell to stay the same, the ratio
of the mass
of the souls and volume needs to stay constant.

[Answer 1] So, if Hell is expanding at a slower rate than
the rate at
which souls enter Hell, then the temperature in Hell will
increase until
all Hell breaks loose.

[Answer 2] Of course, if Hell is expanding at a rate faster
than the
increase in souls in Hell, then the temperature and pressure
will drop
until Hell freezes over.

So which is it? If we accept the postulate (given to me by
Teresa Banyan
during freshman year) that "it'll be a cold day in Hell
before I sleep
with you", and taking into account that I still have not
succeeded in
having sexual relations with her, then [Answer 2] cannot be
correct;
...... thus, Hell is exothermic.

The student got the only A.